Midwives are driving me NUTS

I've had an issue with glucose in my urine this entire pregnancy it seems. This past week however, the midwives said enough is enough and wanted me to take a blood test to see whether or not I am diabetic. This really upset me since I did just fine on my Gestational Diabetes Screening, and also because the baby is a normal size.

I argued with the midwife a little over it, and then agreed to have an additional test done. They told me it was just a blood draw, and I consented, already knowing that everything would come back fine. Well, I get a call the next day, and am told that my results were "normal high" and due to that they want me to test my blood sugar daily. This sent me into tears. I'd have to prick myself 4x a day, everyday, for two weeks. Not what I wanted to hear. I asked what "normal high" meant, and was told it meant that I was of increased risk of possibly developing GD...Reeeeeally? I "might" "possibly" get GD "maybe"? This is why you're forcing me to do this? Needless to say, I was pretty upset.

SB reminded me that in the world of OB's there is a lot of CYA (cover your ...) that has to take place, and he also said that because I'm seeing midwives, they may have to be EXTRA careful. Well, that's great and all, but they're not the ones sticking their fingers 4x a day, and worrying about their bodies betraying them and their unborn babies. SHEESH.

So I complied. I kicked and screamed and cried, but I complied.  The midwife who showed me how to use the monitor was confused as to why I was so upset. I found that upsetting...lol. She pricked my finger, showed me how to use the monitor, and gave me my first reading, a perfectly normal reading. When she asked what I had to eat that day? Carrot Cake. I responded that I  had Carrot cake. Carrot cake that left me with a perfectly normal blood sugar level after the prescribed amount of time. I left the office with my new focus for the next 7 days, forcing myself to prick my finger tips, watching my intake of sweets (meaning, not having any), and keeping a log of what my levels were at each test. It was hard at first, I mean who wants to inflict pain on themselves? It would take me 15 loooong, palm sweating minutes to press the button that would cause the needle to prick me. About a day and a half into it, I began to only take 10 minutes, and by the time I took it for the last time it was able to press that darn button in about a minute. While, it got easier, it never got easy.

And so what were the results? I have normal, healthy, beautiful blood sugar levels. Normal numbers are defined as below 95 for fasting, and below 120 for two hours after a meal. I freaked me freak the first morning I took it because I got 135, higher than BOTH numbers. It made me second guess myself. I lost confidence and thought "Well, maybe there is something wrong with me". I felt down trodden and like a bad mom. It was pretty sad I tell ya!

After that though, every single other test showed a number WELL below acceptable levels; confidence made a full recovery, and I no longer felt like I was mangaging to abuse my child en utero. We have our follow up appointment today (09/16) where I plan on throwing this stupid log in their face and telling them that the added stress from this whole process is FAR worse than any minor amount of GD they may think I could possibly maybe have.

35/35!!!!

Well, I made it! 35/35, the date that for which I've had a ton of anticipation. Of course now that I'm here, I'm too shocked to truely appreciate it, but I'm working on it. Oh, and 35/35 means that I'm 35weeks with only 35 days left to go. Pretty cool how that works out huh?


How far along: 35 wks

Total weight change: Up 20 from pre-preg...still


Maternity clothes: I still have a couple of stretchy cotton shirts, but I'm starting to show out of the bottom of them I think. Actually, I'm starting to show out of the bottom of my materinity shirts too. Hmmm.

Stretch Marks: Si! Still got plenty of em.

Movement: Kind of slower now, I think its starting to get pretty cramped in there.

Sleep: Same ol' same ol'. Some nights are better than others. While my trips to the potty are never limited, they're not the culprit. Its the falling back asleep after that's been getting me. Also, the past two days I've had REM sleep right at 7, which means I have trouble waking up on time, despite how ever many times the alarm goes off.

Best Moment This Week: Not having to stick myself any more! (See my Midwives are driving me nuts post.) Also, allowing my self to get a *little* excited about the baby actually being on the way. I'm slowly starting to pack up and move off of my home on Denial Island.

Belly Button In or Out: Out. Flat. Pudgy. Stretched.

Cravings/Aversions: Ice water, ice

Symptoms: I'm better. Not as tired as I was, I guess I've gotten my second wind. I think I may have begun nesting since mess is really bothering me now. It couldn't have come at a better time considering we've moved so I need to get organized anyway.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Staying pregnant! Lol. I'm not ready for this to be over yet.

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: That people could actually be NICE to pregnant ladies. It's like at first everyone is all preachy, and then as you get bigger, they get less douchie.

Weeks ??? - 32

Blog fail. I can't keep up with how fast everything is going. Everytime I look around, I'm another week up, this is crazy cakes!

How far along: 32 wks

Total weight change: Up 20 from pre-preg
Maternity clothes: All the time. I've bought/worn a few things that weren't
but they are the exception to the rule.

Stretch Marks: Um, heck yes! It started with one, and blossomed into a whole patch of them on either side of my belly underneath my now protruding belly button. The other day I noticed a small line above it too. Weird.

Movement: These past two days especially have been active ones. I'm now at a size where ribs are fair game. My belly has these spasms of rolls and jabbs that send me into uncontrollable laughter. I get pokes in the side now too which is kinda like getting hit in the funny bone, it hurts, but it makes you laugh too. Weird.
Sleep: Got better, then worse. I've started to have some mild insomnia. I think it is because we have so much going on right now, and necessarily the pregnancy.  I did read a few things that said that getting to sleep/staying asleep can be an issue as the third tri rolls along.

Best Moment This Week: Getting to feel so much movement has been wonderful. I am seriously going to miss this. I've also enjoyed everything going so well so far, and that I passed my Glucose Screening Test. No gestational diabetes for me thanks!

Belly Button In or Out: Out. It looks weird too...


Cravings/Aversions: Sweets, ice, carbs

Symptoms: TIRED. Lol. I'm starting to wear out a little. Every morning is a fight to get out of bed, and I'm really starting to run out of steam. I can't stay standing as long as I used to either. Oh and back pain, YOUCH! I have to have proper support or I will be in agony. This body is giving my baby all it's got, and its finally starting to take its toll. Oh, and my dreams have gotten crazy again.
What I'm Looking Forward To: Time giving me a second to catch my breath. I can't believe in roughly 8 weeks, as little as 5, I will be holding my outside baby. Its nuts!

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: As usual, that time would be flying so much. Also, that my body would change this much. I knew I was going to feel and look different, but wow, the amount that has gone on has been eye openning.

23-27 weeks...Whoops!

I didn't realize that I hadn't done an update in a month. I told you time was flying, but I mean, WOW, things are really sneaking up on me! At any rate, here is a wrap up of what the end of the second tri was like for me.


How far along: 23-27 wks

Total weight change: Up 14 from pre-preg

Maternity clothes: Pretty much exclusively. I think I've worn a non maternity shirt maybe 4 or 5 times in the last month? Non mat pants are NOT an option!

Stretch Marks: Sad face. I was laying in bed, and SB says "Hey, when did you scratch yourself?". I knew as soon as he said it that these supposed "scratches" were stretch marks. I had to pull my belly up to see the underside, and lo and behold, two parallel pink lines (reminds me of a + pregnancy test know that I think about it!), running about an inch or two up my belly. I was surpisingly saddened by this. I love my belly, I think that it is beautiful so I guess the stretch marks kinda ruined what I thought was a "perfect" looking belly. I got over that reeeeel fast, and came to the conclusion that my belly is still beautiful, and that it really isn't a big deal. When I got the ones on my thighs, I could have cared less, but the belly ones did kinda throw me for a loop!

Movement: What a difference a month makes. This baby has got their Dance Dance Revolution game hooked up, and plays it all day! This past month this baby has shown itself to be a mover and shaker. I praise God for it, and can't help but already mourn the loss of it once baby is born . I get rolls, kicks, swipes, punches, and stuff I can't describe. Feeling my little one enjoy playing in its space has been life changing. Out of all of the pregnant body does, having the ability to feel your baby move en utero is simply the most amazing. Its so neat having this quiet bond that only the two of us share. It is super humbling too. Baby is moving right now as a matter of fact, and it is wonderful.

Sleep: This past month has had the same set up sleep stealers as previous weeks. I had rhinitis again, then I heartburn. Lately I've just been SUPER hot at night (the 3 days we had no A/C didn't help), and I can't sleep when I'm hot, so that has been a struggle. I still get my rest though, and I've made it in to work everyday (gotta keep that month and a half PTO saved up) so I guess it's not going too bad.

Best Moment This Week: This MONTH has had a lot of best moments. Regular movement is one. Seeing that eveything is in place and perfect with baby is another.  We went to see a specialist last Friday since after two scans the tech at the midwives still struck out on the measurements we need to be cleared for our anatomy scan. The Dr was SUPER nice, and he also had a friendly nurse, and a student shadowing him. I had to go in with a full bladder, which was a little miserable, but once I got to lay down, it took the pressure off and I was a-ok. They got a good look at the cord, the heart, the right femur, right kidney, and the cerebellum. The dr remarked that the baby had a "beautiful cerebellum" when he walked in the room and saw it on the screen (the nurse took a peek while we were waiting), lol. The ultrasound confirmed my suspision from a week ago when I mentioned to a few people that I thought baby had turn head down. The first thing we saw on the screen was their head...directly on top of my bladder..lol! The baby set about kicking at the scanner, so I knew that the legs were in a good position now to get a nice look at thier bits.  After two attempts wtith no luck, they were finally able to see what the baby is working with. The dr printed the sex on a a picture, and gave it to Damon. He wrote "secret" on my chart, so only Sugarbeet, God, and the Dr know what the baby is, and we will never see that Dr again, so I think it is a nice secret that Sugarbeet gets to have all to himself.  He says that things feel more real now, and has started to hound me about registering, so I guess the desired affect of him feeling closer to baby has worked.

Belly Button In or Out: It is giving up the ghost. It used to just stick out after I ate, but now a days it seems to be permanatly pudgy. It's not all the way out yet, be we are getting there.

Cravings/Aversions: Sweets, and ice

Symptoms: I've started nesting a little. I wash the dishes every night now, and anyone who knows me has fallen out of their chair and needs a moment to regroup after reading that.  My back feels better, but I think maybe I'm just getting used to the pain being around. I am getting more tired, and spending more time on the couch. I need to get moving again, and have been walking on my lunch break at least.  The only issue is that walking for long periods gives me some pretty bad round ligament pain, and actually really tires me out! I've decided that I'm too small and it is too soon for me to be this lethargic, so I'm regrouping efforts to keep moving.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Getting my Gestational Diabetes test over with...oh and passing!
Things I Wish I Would Have Known: That I would have missed a month of writing my symptoms, nearly two months of taking pictures, and that I would be so okay with staying home. I say it every week, and these past 4 that I've missed should make it evident, but I really think this is all happening too fast. I've only got 90 days left till my due date, and I wish I could cling to each moment as tight as the last.

Double Digits

For the second time this pregnancy, I have reached Double Digits! Here is a screen shot of my ticker for today:

 I've only got 99 days left!  Not since 10 weeks has double digits been so exciting! It feels like this milestone came very quickly. Let the countdown to the countdown to the countdown begin! Lol. After here, I think my next milestone isn't until 31 weeks when I'll have the less than double digit coundown (Holy Moley!), 35/35, and then after that it is 38 weeks, which is full term. Once there, all I have left is, well, Birth Day!
I am hanging on for dear life right now, everything is going so fast, and I can't believe how much closer I am to meeting this little guy or doll. I am so excited!

Viability

This was a looooong time coming...and yet got here so fast! I am 24w, which besides meaning I've got 6 months under my belt, also means that if I were to go into pre-term labor, this would be the first time there would be measurable odds in favor of the baby surviving. Take a looksie:

COMPLETED WEEKS OF GESTATION AT BIRTH

(using last menstrual period)

CHANCE OF SURVIVAL

21 weeks and less          0%

    22 weeks                      0-10%

     23 weeks                     10-35%

      24 weeks                    40-70%

     25 weeks                      50-80%

     26 weeks                      80-90%

 27 weeks                     >90%

30 weeks                     >95%

34 weeks                     >98%

As you can see, 24 weeks, while not ideal, is a good place to be for the survival of your baby! I still can't believe that I am here, it has been a very short time, and I feel like I'm constantly having to adjust to the fact that this pregnancy is going so quickly.  I sent SB a message about how we we're at v-day earlier this week, and he replied with the baby is "here to stay". Don't ask me why, but it really struck a cord with me. Everything about our lives has followed this natural progression that never felt pushed or hurried along. Even in getting pregnant, it just felt like what we should do, like it was the next step that we were ready for.
Now it begins to sink in that in just a few, few, very few, short months, we will be parents. Holy Cats.

Weekend Plans

This was a LOOOOOOONG week. I feel like it went on and on and on, and I am so glad that it is finally Friday! That being said, here are the plans for the weekend (think)

Friday:

Head out to Elaine's with-

• my completed crochet project (to show off)
• my fabrics so we can measure, cut, sew, and therefore complete my quilt top
• my dress that I ordered online for Mason's wedding in case we need to make any alterations
• my cloth diapers so that I can demonstrate how easy they are
• my fabric for the cloth wipes I'm making. I need help pinning the two different fabrics together and I really need help cutting
• Possibly my sewing machine

Saturday:

• Go to Micheal's and Hobby Lobby to find some new yarn for another blanket for my baby
• POSSIBLY go to Quilters' Emporium to possibly buy some fabric to possibly make a blanket. I'm been trying to limit myself to one project of a type at a time, so technically I can't start a blanket until this quilt is finished. BOOO
• Hang out with the Sugarbeet and go to a birthday party for a friend from college
• Be baller

Sunday:

• Get smart and get to church
• Go to Santos' birthday party
• Go to family night
• Dread going to work the next day, but look forward to another week!

14 weeks yo!

How far along: 14 wks

Total weight change: ZERO

Maternity clothes: Um, heck yes!! I wore my jeans on Friday for the LAST TIME.  I sat at work absolutely miserable.  I've been coming home and changing into maternity clothes at night, lol. I bought some stuff this week, and that included some slacks for work and some jeans, which I desperatly needed.  I'm wearing my band today, and have decided that I never want to again.  It was nice while it lasted, but now that I've had  a taste of true mat pants, this band is just a terrible substitute and no longer a bff. :(

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: I wish

Sleep: Besides my nose waking me up all night for several nights, I think it was okay...but not really.

Best Moment This Week: Reaching 13w3d, the official end of the first trimester! To celebrate, the baby decided to make me feel like crap...which I loved! It was a nice reminder that everything is going well, and that I've actually got a baby on board.  Oh, an we got the quilt laid out this week.  We were up until 1 am, but Ms Virginia, Mrs Oldham, Rosalind and I got it all ironed out. It took starting over 3 times, but I'm glad to say that it is done. Next week we get to sewing!

Belly Button In or Out: In

Cravings/Aversions: I've been eating whatever, the aversions sometimes show up when its time for dinner, and especially when its time for meal planning.

Symptoms: Still. back. pain. Friday I had terrbible nausea, lightheadedness, headachynesss, and general malaise.  I also had a 3 day long headache, and since pregnancy has turn me into a hypochondriac, I was convinced I had pre-eclampsia.  I gave in on Saturday morning and took two tylenol, and after a nap I felt a lot better.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Feeling movement! Also, we have our appointment next week on Monday so I'm just counting down the days till I get to hear that sweet little heartbeat again.

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: Its a little known secret that when you get pregnant, eveyone else goes to med school and gets a degree in obsetetristics... I'm surrounded by Dr's now, and its terrible! I also wish I would have known that I would have such a daunting task ahead of me with this whole cloth daipering thing! There are so many options and options with those options that its actually quite out of control. Pregnancy is one of the few times in life that you can actually suffer from an information overload.  Trying to learn all that I can about cding has left me confused and overwhelmed. I feel like the normal answer to being confused (which is more research), has been counterintuitive and left me still scratching my head in wonder!

I'm a hippie, I know, I know

I'm in the process of starting to collect things needed for our Little Ones arrival, and in the process have begun to fully flesh out my inner hippie. I've made some choices that I think tend to be less than popular, but when it all boils down to it, there really is no way to please every one (insert "so just please God" at the end of this sentence, but that’s for another time).


That being said, here are some of the choices I've decided would be best for me, my baby, and the WORLD! Lol:

Minimal medical intervention (honestly, I'd like to show up to the hospital when ready to push)

Seeing midwives instead of Drs (cause I'm not sick)

Cloth diapering

Using cloth wipes

Utilizing items that can be found used instead of buying new (we have accomplished this one pretty well if I do say so myself)

Attempting to get as much clothing as possible second hand

Not giving into the over consumerism that is specifically marketed to naive and or fearful parents

Exclusively Breastfeeding



Most if not all of the choices above has caught me flack from every female member of society. "You can't do this, you won't have time for that, its just not practical". When I asked someone why they were being so negative they told me "I'm not being negative, I'm just being real. I don't want to sugar coat anything".

Makes me think. It makes me think why everyone is under the impression that cloth is so difficult, when they have never tried it. Makes me wonder why the amount of things I buy for the baby is equal to the amount I have actually prepared. I don't know how these time tested, mothering techniques became so taboo (actually I do, and if you know me, you know that I blame it on the "Women’s' Liberation"...lol, long story). At any rate, I think that what I would like to do for my child is return to a simpler, more time-tested way of rearing my LO. Women breastfed for centuries, cloth diapered just as long as well. Used soft clothes to wipe their babies bottoms, not paper sitting in a solution of chemicals, and made/recycled their own clothes for baby.

I think that a lot of the attitude I get comes from the "I got real, and then I got Luvs" phenomenon. If you're not familiar, the Luv's diaper brand has commercials that feature new moms who discuss how "in the beginning when baby was little, I'd only get the expensive diapers". There is a scene of a newborn baby laying so small and quietly in a crib, then that scene cuts to a toddler running around and throwing things. The baby-moon is OVER! Lol. Time to get some cheap diapers since that is what is practical and makes sense.

I think that a lot of new Moms go through this, and it changes you. You had all of these ideas of how things were going to be, how you were going to parent, the way everything would be perfect, with just a little work and patience....Then life starts, and its not the rosy picture that was originally envisioned. Never letting your baby cry turns out to be a harder task than you thought, or you end up with an infant that nurses every two hours for 45 minutes, oh, and cluster feeds in the evenings. Life gets real, and idealism goes out of the window. Then some new fresh faced mom who has NO idea what she is getting herself into shows up and says "I have the exact same ideas that you had!", and you say "Oh no, no no no, it doesn't work that way sister!".

I've seen it on different levels. The women who had natural birth say that it is possible to do that, but CDing or BFing is going to be an issue. The women that BF said, "oh well that wasn't too bad, but you're going to be begging for an epidural, and who want's to touch poop" (which by the way, I'm convinced you do anyway...).

Women are tending to show themselves critical of what they didn't do themselves, and I find that surprising. If you want to find somebody who's mind is completely closed to different choices than theirs, meet a mom. Its not a bad thing. We've learned how to rear our children this way since the dawn of time, (and personally I think that it is engrained in our nature). By us comparing ourselves against each other we learned how to employ time tested, mom tested techniques. It was how our species survived. If a mom was doing a terrible job, and didn't look at how another mom was doing a better one, her baby would die. We need community in order to be successful, but I think we also need a healthy dose of open mindedness to new ideas as well.

I often wonder how the first mom who stuck her baby in a sposie was greeted. Or the mom that gave her baby formula. I bet convention jeered her, and made her to feel like she was doing it wrong, that nobody did it that way, and that she would change her mind. Yet here we are with those things being the new convention.

The other thing that I think moms tend to do is feel as if we are competing. Whose baby holds their head up first, rolls over, sits up, sleeps through the night, walks, talks, feeds themselves, becomes a Noble Laureate. And not just that, but by me merely saying "Oh, no thanks for that diaper coupon, I don't really plan on using disposable diapers", I get this visceral reaction of another woman’s subconscious mind saying "What do you think, you're better than me? You have no clue, you don't even have a baby yet, you'll see". YIKES. 0.0

At any rate, all of this long rant of a post was to say that despite my unpopular choices, and no matter how many I stick to, how many I toss aside, or what new methods I adopt, I know that I will be loving and caring for my baby actively and daily with all that I have in me. Isn't that all that should count?

13 weeks and all is well

How far along: 13 wks

Total weight change: None

Maternity clothes: My super sweet coworker brought me a couple of shirts that she had (she had an October baby too!) and I went and got 2 pairs of slacks, some shorts, and some shirts. Sugarbeet was nice enough to get me some new shoes too! I needed some heels to wear with my new slacks, but none of my black heels are properly broken in, meaning I needed to get some more "sensible" heels.  They are a 3in peep toe platform, über comfortable! I have no clothes I can wear comfortably without my band, and a few of my blouses are getting a little too tight.  All of my cotton/stretchy stuff is still fine.

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: I wish

Sleep: MUCH BETTER! I've been able to stay alseep much longer, and am finding that I don't go in the middle of the night as often. Getting to bust some zzz's is awesome!

Best Moment This Week: Getting more and more comfortable that this little one is here to stay.  God has tried and tried to get through my thick skull, but alas, I'm quite good at hitting the "ignore" button on his calls. I know that I was created for this very thing, but sometimes its hard to believe that I could be this blessed. While I haven't stuggled with infertility, I still find myself identifying with Sarah...except for the letting Sugarbeet sleep with someone else part..Lol.

Belly Button In or Out: In

Cravings/Aversions: Neither. I've been up for anything lately.

Symptoms: Still. back. pain. The girls still hate life too, but other than that I've been okay. OH, I almost forgot the best symptom of all, my linea negra has showed up!!!! I present the bottom half of my belly to any lady who will look so that I can proudly show my first exterior sign of our little one. SB loves it, he thinks its adorable, and I find it extremly reasuring. *hand cupped to one side of mouth: don't tell anyone, but sometimes I go to the restroom at work to look at it.* Also, I've had to go much more during the day, and of course when I get there I'm treated to the relief of tinkle tinkle tinkle...yeah a reeeal potty emergency here.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Continuing to grow and change

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: I knew everyone was going to have their opinion, but I wish I would have known that it was going to be impossible to avoid hearing it! I think that pregnancy should be don't ask, don't tell. Also, I wish my co-workers would stop being so conscerned with me getting fat.

Ugly

Pregnancy has made me UGLY. It seems the "glow" pregnancy fairy passed me up and had her lesser known, not as nice "ugly stick" fairy filled in for her.
My skin is covered in acne, and the ance leaves me a nice little reminder of its presence in the form of a scar.  My face is COVERED in dark spots from where the acne has left nasty discoloration on my skin. 
My skin is dry too. I had an entire half of the the outside part of my lips slough off in dry flaky madness. As for my lips themselves, they change skin everyday in big huge chunks, leaving enourmous cracks in them, despite large amounts of chapstick.

You wanna know what the worst part about it is? I love every second of it ; ).

Week 12!

How far along: 12 wks

Total weight change: None

Maternity clothes: I bought some stuff this week. Maternity clothes are not easy to shop for, everything is so hit or miss. Plus, the stuff that I'm drawn to immediatly is always a million dollars, no bueno. So yeah, I got a few pieces, and hopefully will continue to build up a wardrobe a little at a time. 

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: Whomp Whomp

Sleep: I dont know about this. I'm not sleeping through the night because of the allergies, but also because certain parts of my anatomy hurt and when I move it wakes me up. Also, I think I'm still going to the loo at night, but some nights I'm so out of it, I don't know if I did or didn't.

Best Moment This Week:  Being 12 weeks.  I'm so close to being out of the first tri I can feel it! Literally, I'm starting to feel more like myself again. I told my Grandparents and they were super excited.  My grandmother took 30 minutes to explain to me the proper foods to eat, and that a well fell baby en utero will equal a baby that eats well once it's born. I told work on Wed., everyone was nice and congradulated me, I even got a few hugs! I finally feel like I'm out!

Belly Button In or Out: In
Cravings/Aversions: Mexican food is out officially! I'm so over it and am back to a more normal human diet...well humans not from Mexico. I've gotten more of a sweet tooth, but the HUNGER (vampire style) is gone.
Symptoms: Still. back. pain. It still hurts to lay on my back, and it wakes me up at night when I roll over. ACK. I had a relapse on Friday where I felt super mcuber tired, had a headache, felt dizzy, and needed to eat a pizza (it was a magherita single serve pizza) at 11:00 at night. It went away the very next day, and I can honestly say that I do not miss those days!

What I'm Looking Forward To: Each and everyday that I am pregnant.

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: Hmmm, I guess that things could go so well without my intervention.

Knocked Up Week 10-11

Whoa dude, time is flying! Here's what was going on the past two weeks:

How far along: 10-11 wks

Total weight change: None

Maternity clothes: No, but my bella band is still my BFF.  I still have pants that I can fit and zip, but I don't want to strangle the poor baby.

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: Got to see a hiccup!-see below for details

Sleep: Getting better. I'm suffering from allergies for the first time, and can't breath at night.  I've tried a humidifier and Vick's, but all I really seem to be able to do is sit around miserable. I've woken up several times to find snot running out of my nose like a faucet. FUN!

Best Moment This Week: Getting to hear and see our Little One! Week 10 flew by because I spent the majority of that time anxious for out appointment with the Midwives on 03/28. I went to the mall the Sunday before the appointment, and spent some quiet time reflecting on everything. This appt was a big deal since 9 weeks is when all of the structures are in place for the baby, after that everything else is really just growth. With that being said, 9 weeks is the last time that most developmental abnormalities could cause a loss.  That's a big deal! I was 11w to the day when we went in, and I was ready to find out that the baby had made it past that 9w crucial phase just fine. 
          I was so nervous that my blood pressure was through the roof, they ended up checking it twice, but it didn't budge. The midwife came in, and asked some questions I don't remember because I was waiting to get to the part where she would whip out the doppler for us to hear the heartbeat.  FINALLY she gets it out, and lets us know that we may not hear it immediatly, and not to be conscerned if it takes her a little while to find it. Well, 3 MINUTES LATER (I know this becuase we recorded it), she gives up and calls for the ultrasound machine :(. Part of me was totally ok with this since I wanted to see the baby anyway. After she called for the machine, she said "Let's keep trying until it gets here", and of course the second she touches it to my belly, the hearbeat comes through loud and clear! She asks if we want the ultrasound still and I yell "Heck yes!", lol. We got to see LO...laying there...The heart was beating nice and strong but I guess s/he was sleep cause they were just chillin.  She pushed on my belly a few times to jostle him/her, but they just persisted with their napping. We did get to see him/her hiccup a few times, they were the most precious hiccups I've ever seen!
        It was a great appointment, and the Midwife says everything looks great, baby is doing well, my weight is just fine, and at 150 bpm the heartrate was right on track.
       Oh and did I mention DOUBLE DIGITS!! Whoohoo!

Belly Button In or Out: In

Cravings/Aversions: This baby is going to be born with a Sombrero...

Symptoms: Still back pain. It hurts to lay on my back, and it takes me forever to turn over to get off of it.  Also, the girls are not happy lately.  They ache and are SO sensitive right now. My friend EW remarked that they are the size of basketballs, thanks friend.... Lol.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Continuing to grow and change. I plan on telling work this week too, so that should be fun! Oh, and my GRANDPARENTS! They're going to be thrilled.  This baby is going to make for a fabulous Thanksgiving!

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: I wish I would've known that pregnancy could make you more susceptible to crap like allergies. I also wish I would have known that time was going to fly this quickly. It seems like we have so long to go, yet looking back on how far we've been, its flying by!

Knocked Up Week 8-9

Now that I've been KU for 9 weeks, lets see what's poppin:

How far along: 8-9wks

Total weight change: None

Maternity clothes: Still none. I went shopping at Macy's this past weekend but only tried on. Heidi Klum makes some adorable stuff that I think I will definatly be investing in!

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: Too early

Sleep: Things are a little out of control right now. I had about 2-3 days in a row where I woke up to go to the potty and ending up staying awake for hours. Not a cool feeling, especially when the alarm goes off.

Best Moment This Week: TELLING OUR FAMILY! Sugarbeet's mom was going out of town this weekend, and we weren't sure if we were going to see her on Sunday (our usual family night), so we went ahead and told her. I played the video we made and she watched it and freaked out the way any good mother would! It was great. Then that Sunday, we went to the park and met up with Sugarbeet's sister and brother in law. He led the prayer and then made the announcement. Everyone was super happy, and told us "about time"..Lol. It's wonderful not having this such a secret, and knowing that we have family praying for us to have continued health. I also enjoyed going maternity clothes shopping, spending some alone time with the baby on Saturday while we ran errands, and hanging out with Patrice and all of her babies!

Belly Button In or Out: In
Cravings/Aversions: Still in love with mexican food. Particulary beef tacos with corn tortillas. Can't get enough of them.
Symptoms: Lots of back pain lately. I think I'm going to have pretty bad nerve pain throughout this pregnancy. Its started already, so I can't imagine it will do anything but get worse.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Getting to tell more people! I think that I've popped already, but maybe I'm just being self-conscience. No one else can seem to see what I see, but I really do think that there is a difference!

Things I Wish I Would Have Known: I wish I would have known that heartburn was real. I also wish I would have known that water would cause it...lol.

Knocked Up Questionnaire Week 7

So, how did week 7 of being KU go?

How far along: 7w

Total weight change: hmmm 2 or 3 lbs up?

Maternity clothes: Not yet. Bella Band has been my BFF, although we're technically frienemies since the darn thing rides up all the time! The issue isn't with my casual wear, it's all of my slacks that I wear for work. The band is great since work pants are normally those little slider/clip things and not buttons. I have two pairs of work slacks that are still going strong, but I have to unbutton when I sit at my desk :(. 

Stretch Marks: No

Movement: Too early

Sleep: Sleep was a major issue at 6 weeks, I never felt comfortable.  This week was much better, I didn't wake up as much, or maybe even at all, to use the bathroom in the middle of the night...wait, yes I did... Anywho, besides waking up feeling like I got hit by a train, sleep has been much better!

Best Moment This Week: I got to see a heartbeat!!! There was a little gummy bear in there with a heartbeat of 132 bpm.  More importantly, I got to hear a hearbeat, something that I never, ever, EVER could have dreamed of being real for me, not in a million years. Its still hard to believe that this is real, that it was MY baby I saw and heard on the screen. So surreal.

Belly Button In or Out: Still in... how do you answer this question if you have an outtie to begin with?

Cravings/Aversions: Aversions? Food, All of it. The sound of every food ever has been completely unappealing. I get SO hungry, think that something sounds good, and before I can get my wallet out, it sounds terrible again. I even lost the lust for my BFF, chocolate. Cruelty at it's best.   Cravings?  I ate a BLT for the first time in recorded history this week. Oh, and MEXICAN food!!!! Enchiladas, tacos, tortas, fajitas, all of it. Love love love the idea of mexican all the time. Except for when the aversions are in full swing that is!

Symptoms: I've been pretty green. I feel like the nausea dominates the first half of my day. Around 12 or so it lets up thankfully, and also I've had no vomiting, so I'm extremly thankful for that! I've had heartburn for the first time in my life, and have had some other wonderful pregnancy related gastrointestinal issues...leaving it at that. Lol.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Telling our family. 
 
Things I Wish I Would Have Known: I wish I would have realized sooner how swift this would all go. I know what you're thinking, I'm not even 2 months! But despite the day to day drag, things are moving right along, and I have to try to wrap my mind around this quicker than anticipated. There is so much that I want to do creatively, and trying to cram it in to less than 7 months will be a challenge.
I have such an issue with fear and I think that is causing the time shift. I don't want anything to go wrong, and that VERY real fear that something could go wrong has left me drained of emotion. To want something so badly, and get it, to just have it ripped away, is a pain that (luckily) few people experience. I don't want that to happen to me, but in the process of protecting myself, I'm excluding my baby. I'm pregnant, and despite any fears I may have, I am so, so, so very in love with this baby. So, I guess it's time that I walk the walk if I'm going to talk the talk.

How did I get here?!

It is the day before I'm 17 weeks (if you ask the midwives I am 17 weeks today) and I've decided that it is finally time I sat down and wrote, err typed, what happened 13 1/2 weeks ago:

     I was smack dab in the middle of the 2WW, a time where most people are pulling out their hair in anticipation while analyzing, over anlayzing, and re-analyzing every twinge, ache, pain, hiccup, burp, potty break, and skin anomaly. My 2ww left me hoping for it to be over, not to test, but to have a fresh cycle to start with and move forward. 
     I felt nothing this cycle. No tender boobs, no cramps, not implantation spotting, no tiredness, no increased urination, NOTHING. I just new that this was not my time, and that I would have to regroup for the next cycle; at some point I even stopped taking my vitamins too, I'm telling you, I just new this wasn't it!
     Previous to all of this, I got a test date from Fertility Friend of Feb 8, 2011. This date was a ray of hope since it is one of my BFF's birthdays. When this date popped up I saw it as good juju, and it elated me...initially. As the days ticked on, and I felt nothing, I resigned myself to not testing till 14dpo (versus starting at 12), and really just waiting on AF.
     Weeeell, there was a little hiccup in the plan. On Sunday Feb 6 (Super Bowl Sunday), Sugarbeet decided he needed a haircut. I took him to the mall where he gets it done, and got to thinking after I dropped him off. You see, I like to test in private, I don't want SB to have any idea what's going on because I like to have that the to myself to digest and process the results, whatever they may be. I realized that there would be no other time for me to get a test without him knowing by Tuesday, so I decided to run out to the store while he was getting his ears raised. I picked up a 2 pack of FRERs and hid them in my enormous purse for later.
     Meanwhile, I start having terrible cramps, so bad I think I ended up taking something for them.  Those cramps combined with the fact that I had a big temp dip that morning left me pretty resolute that I would be on to the next cycle before Tuesday... Fast forward to later that afternoon at home, I'm laying on the couch by myself since SB is next door playing video games with our baller neighbor.  I sit there and I lay there, and I sit back up, and I change the stations on the tv and I pet my dog, and I try and I try and I try to distract my self, but those doggon sticks are CALLING MY NAME. What was I thinking? How did I believe for a second that I would have the self control to not use them once I had them in my possession.  I shuffle around for a little while longer, but finally I give in.


Positive. Super positive. Positive before the control line develops. Positive before the liquid moves all the way across the test screen.

Whoa.

What up homeboys!

Hmmm. Once again ignoring any hiatus that has occured, lets just into weekend plans:

Friday
Work :(
Meeting up with Patty and heading out to Rodeo to see JANET
Cocktails!!!

Saturday
Taking Coco and Mimi to the park (I'm dog sitting my MIL's dog this weekend, and she is a handful and a half. Must take her out to get rid of some of that energy)
Going to a couple of different half-priced books
Possibly going to Micheals'
???

Sunday
Going to church
Eating
Resting
Returning that dog....