How not to be jealous?

How do you get to be truely happy for someone?
"WHAT, you got a promotion and now make WAY more than I do, but you don't even have a degree? Wow, congrats!"  I say that, but on the inside I think "You're a whore, you slept with any and everyone available to get this promotion, and you just wait cause in 5 years my income will  have doubled and I will be the one with the brand new car and then you'll see, and then YOU"LL ALL SEE!!!!"...while this is going on I'm sure I'm standing there with a huge smile on my face, maybe with a little drool slowly winding down the side of it.

And how is it that no matter what you do in life, and no matter how good you are at it, there is someone is better. BETTER!! And when this jerkfaceloser shows up, why is it that you have to not only be happy for them, but even like somehow appreaciate them handing you your entrails on a platter. "Well, at least  I can say I got beat by the best!". BLUH. Would we be forced to be so gracious if everything was to the death? "At the end of the interview process for the file room position, only one of you shall still be alive". What then?

I have a serious problem being happy for people. Mostly cause I hate them, but also because I want what they have, and can't have it. There are somethings that I actually do hate, but don't want, like to go to bed at 10 everynight cause my husband and I are boring. Or a new car (because I abhor car notes). But there are other things that I grow green over like houses not in the suburbs and not having to pay student loans. My life ain't so bad, but compared to yours, IT SUCKS. I tend to have that attitude sometimes when it comes to comparing myself to other people. And it's sad, I know.